top of page

What Are 5 Signs Of Low Self Esteem?

Updated: Apr 12

Did you know that low self-esteem affects approximately 85% of people at some point in their lives? Low self-esteem can have a significant impact on a person's overall well-being and quality of life. It can affect their confidence, relationships, and even their mental health. If you've been feeling down or doubting yourself lately, you may be experiencing signs of low self-esteem.


Key Takeaways About Low Self Esteem:

  • Lack of confidence

  • Negative self-talk and self-criticism

  • Fear of failure

  • Trouble accepting compliments

  • Difficulty setting boundaries and being a people-pleaser


Kelly Hint has a ton of experience as a Therapist in New York who turned into a life coach and relationship coach. With her passion for helping women step into their fullest potential, Kelly specializes in working with anxiety symptoms, depression, low self esteem and relationship problems uniquely focused on the female experience.



The Impact of Low Self Esteem on Mental Health

Low self-esteem can have a negative impact on mental health. While it is not considered a mental illness itself, it can contribute to or worsen mental health conditions such as depression, anxiety, and suicidal thinking. When individuals have low self-esteem, they often struggle to see their own worth and value, leading to a range of emotional and psychological difficulties.


One of the ways low self-esteem affects mental health is by making it difficult for individuals to achieve their goals and form healthy relationships. When someone doesn't believe in themselves or their capabilities, it becomes challenging to pursue their aspirations or connect with others on a meaningful level. This can result in feelings of frustration, isolation, and a sense of not belonging.


a black and white photo of a woman with short curly hair smirking at the camera, low self esteem, how to improve self esteem

Additionally, low self-esteem can lead to an increased sensitivity to criticism. Individuals with low self-esteem might take even constructive feedback personally, causing them to become defensive or withdrawn. This can create a cycle of negative interactions, further reinforcing their negative self-perception and impacting their overall mental well-being.


In addition, individuals with low self-esteem may experience excessive preoccupation with personal problems and negative thoughts. This constant self-criticism and self-doubt can contribute to the development or exacerbation of mental health conditions, such as depression and anxiety disorders. It may also lead to physical symptoms, such as changes in appetite or sleep patterns, fatigue, and increased susceptibility to substance abuse as a means of coping.


It is crucial to address low self-esteem and its impact on mental health. By improving self-esteem, individuals can cultivate a more positive self-perception, enhance their emotional well-being, and develop healthier coping strategies. Building self-confidence, challenging negative thoughts, seeking support from loved ones, and engaging in activities that promote self-care can all contribute to the improvement of self-esteem and overall mental health.


Causes of Low Self Esteem

Low self-esteem can be influenced by various factors, which can have a lasting impact on a person's perception of themselves and their worth. Understanding the causes of low self-esteem is crucial in addressing and overcoming these negative feelings. Some common factors that contribute to low self-esteem include:


  • Experiences in early childhood: Negative experiences during childhood, such as bullying or neglect, can significantly impact a person's self-esteem. Traumatic events or constant criticism can lead to feelings of inadequacy and a diminished sense of self-worth.


  • Social media and societal ideals: In today's digital age, social media platforms often perpetuate unrealistic standards of beauty, success, and popularity. Constant exposure to these ideals can lead to feelings of comparison, inadequacy, and low self-esteem, especially among teenagers.


  • Stressful life events: Difficult life events, such as relationship problems, loss, or serious illness, can take a toll on a person's self-esteem. These challenges can shake one's confidence, generate self-doubt, and contribute to a negative self-image.


  • Negative core beliefs: Negative core beliefs are deep-rooted thoughts and beliefs about oneself that often develop during childhood or adolescence. These beliefs can be formed as a result of negative experiences or messages received from significant others, peers, or society. They shape one's self-perception, influencing and perpetuating low self-esteem.


two girls side hugging each other while standing on the beach in new jersey during the winter, low self esteem, how to improve self esteem

Identifying the causes of low self-esteem is an essential step in breaking free from the cycle of negative self-perception. By understanding these underlying factors, individuals can begin to challenge and change their beliefs, develop self-compassion, and cultivate a healthier sense of self-worth.


How To Improve Self Esteem

To improve your self-esteem, there are several strategies you can implement in your daily life. By taking proactive steps, you can gradually build a more positive self-perception and enhance your overall well-being.


1. Identify Troubling Conditions and Situations: Take note of the situations or environments that negatively impact your self-esteem. This awareness will help you make conscious choices to avoid or navigate these triggers.


2. Become Aware of Negative Thoughts and Beliefs: Pay attention to the negative thoughts and beliefs that cross your mind. Challenge them by questioning their validity and replacing them with positive and empowering affirmations.


3. Challenge Negative or Inaccurate Thoughts: Whenever negative thoughts arise, challenge their accuracy. Look for evidence that contradicts those thoughts and focus on more realistic and positive perspectives.


4. Adjust Your Mindset: Cultivate a growth mindset by embracing the idea that you can learn and grow from challenges and setbacks. Nurture a positive outlook and believe in your capacity for personal development.


5. Focus on Strengths and Achievements: Acknowledge your strengths and celebrate your achievements, no matter how small they may seem. Recognizing your capabilities will boost your self-esteem and reinforce a positive self-image.


6. Set Realistic Goals: Set achievable goals that align with your values and interests. Break them down into smaller, manageable steps, and celebrate your progress along the way.


7. Practice Self-Care and Self-Compassion: Prioritize self-care activities that nurture your physical, emotional, and mental well-being. Treat yourself with kindness, practice self-compassion, and forgive yourself for mistakes or setbacks.


8. Surround Yourself with Supportive People: Surrounding yourself with people who uplift and support you can significantly impact your self-esteem. Seek out friends, family, or mentors who believe in you and provide positive reinforcement.


9. Seek Professional Help if Needed: If you're struggling with low self-esteem, consider reaching out to a professional therapist or counselor who can guide and support you in your journey towards improved self-esteem.

Strategies for Improving Self Esteem

Identify troubling conditions and situations

Become aware of negative thoughts and beliefs

Challenge negative or inaccurate thoughts

Adjust your mindset

Focus on strengths and achievements

Set realistic goals

Practice self-care and self-compassion

Surround yourself with supportive people

Seek professional help if needed

The Link Between Self Esteem and Self-Confidence

Self-esteem and self-confidence are fundamental aspects of a person's overall well-being and personal growth. While these terms are often used interchangeably, they have distinct meanings and implications. Self-esteem refers to an individual's overall sense of self-worth and value, encompassing their perception of themselves as a whole. On the other hand, self-confidence pertains to a person's belief in their abilities, competence, and potential in specific areas of life.


People with low self-esteem often struggle with self-confidence, as their negative self-perception can overshadow their belief in their own capabilities. However, it is important to note that self-confidence can be developed and strengthened independently from self-esteem. By acquiring and honing new skills, individuals can improve their self-confidence even if they still struggle with low self-esteem.


Building self-confidence involves stepping out of one's comfort zone, challenging oneself, and taking risks. By setting and achieving realistic goals, individuals can gradually build a sense of accomplishment and belief in their abilities. This process requires practice, perseverance, and a growth mindset.


It's worth noting that while self-confidence can exist independently, it is often influenced by self-esteem. By working on improving self-esteem, individuals can also enhance their self-confidence. Cultivating a positive self-image, practicing self-compassion, and challenging negative self-talk are all ways to boost self-esteem and consequently boost self-confidence.


The Role of Boundaries and People-Pleasing in Self Esteem

When it comes to self-esteem, establishing and maintaining boundaries is crucial. People with low self-esteem often struggle in this area, as they find it difficult to set limits and prioritize their own needs. Additionally, they may engage in people-pleasing behaviors, which can further diminish their sense of self-worth. Understanding the connection between boundaries, people-pleasing, and self-esteem is essential for personal growth and improving overall well-being.


two woman sitting next to each other and laughing on a concrete bench, low self esteem, how to improve self esteem

Boundaries:

Boundaries are the emotional and physical limits that individuals establish in order to protect their well-being. They serve as guidelines for how we allow others to treat us, and they define what we are comfortable with in different situations. For individuals with low self-esteem, establishing boundaries can be challenging, as they may fear rejection or believe that their needs are not valid or equally important.


Without healthy boundaries, people with low self-esteem often find themselves constantly giving in to the demands and expectations of others. They may feel obligated to please and accommodate everyone else, disregarding their own needs in the process. This pattern of people-pleasing ultimately reinforces feelings of inadequacy and diminishes their self-esteem even further.


People-Pleasing:

People-pleasing is a behavior rooted in the desire to gain approval and acceptance from others. People with low self-esteem often engage in this behavior as a means of seeking external validation and avoiding conflict or rejection. They prioritize the needs and wants of others above their own, often at the expense of their well-being.


While being considerate and helpful towards others is not inherently negative, excessive people-pleasing can become detrimental to one's self-esteem. Constantly seeking validation from others indicates a lack of self-worth and an overreliance on external factors for self-esteem. This can create a never-ending cycle of feeling unfulfilled and inadequate.


Improving Self-Esteem Through Boundaries:

Building healthy boundaries is crucial for improving self-esteem. It involves recognizing one's own needs, setting clear limits on what is acceptable, and communicating these boundaries assertively with others. By establishing and honoring boundaries, individuals with low self-esteem can begin to prioritize their own well-being and build a foundation of self-worth.


Here are some steps to help improve self-esteem through boundaries:


  1. Self-reflection: Take the time to understand your own needs, values, and limits. Reflect on past experiences where boundaries were violated or neglected.


2. Identify boundary violations: Recognize situations and relationships where your boundaries have been crossed or compromised. This could include instances where you felt taken advantage of or uncomfortable.


3. Communicate assertively: Learn to express your boundaries in a clear and respectful manner. Practice assertive communication skills to ensure that your needs are heard and respected.


4. Take small steps: Start by setting boundaries in low-risk situations and gradually work your way up to more challenging ones.


5. Seek support: Surround yourself with supportive individuals who respect your boundaries and encourage your personal growth.


By establishing and maintaining healthy boundaries, individuals with low self-esteem can gradually shift their focus from people-pleasing to self-care and personal growth. This not only enhances self-esteem but also enables them to cultivate healthier, more fulfilling relationships.


The Importance of Positive Self-Talk and Accepting Compliments

Positive self-talk and accepting compliments are key practices for improving self-esteem. When it comes to self-talk, changing negative thoughts and beliefs into positive and supportive ones can have a profound impact on how you perceive yourself and your abilities. By consciously acknowledging your strengths and achievements, you can cultivate a more positive self-image and boost your self-esteem.


Similarly, learning to accept compliments graciously is essential for enhancing your self-esteem. People with low self-esteem often struggle to accept compliments due to their negative self-perception. They may dismiss or downplay compliments, undermining their own self-worth. However, by recognizing and appreciating compliments, you actively reinforce positive affirmations about yourself, fostering a healthier sense of self-esteem.


To help you understand the importance of positive self-talk and accepting compliments, let's explore some practical examples:

Positive Self-Talk

Accepting Compliments

You remind yourself that you are capable and deserving of success, fostering a can-do attitude.

When someone compliments your work, you say, "Thank you! I worked hard on this project."

You encourage yourself to see challenges as opportunities for growth and learning.

When someone compliments your appearance, you say, "Thank you! I appreciate your kind words."

You celebrate your accomplishments, no matter how small, and acknowledge your progress.

When someone compliments your skills, you say, "Thank you! I've been working on improving in that area."

By incorporating positive self-talk into your daily routine and learning to embrace compliments, you can gradually build your self-esteem and develop a more positive self-perception. Remember, improving self-esteem takes time and practice, so be patient and kind to yourself throughout the process.


Conclusion - Signs of Low Self Esteem

Low self-esteem can have a significant impact on various aspects of life, from mental health to relationships and personal well-being. When you recognize the signs of low self-esteem, you have the power to make positive changes that can lead to a more fulfilling life. Improving your self-esteem is essential for developing a positive self-perception and experiencing greater overall life satisfaction.


headshot of kelly hint a life coach and relationship coach in new york at kelly hint coaching, low self esteem, how to improve self esteem
Kelly Hint | Empowerment Coach For Women

There are several strategies you can implement to improve your self-esteem. Building confidence is key, and you can achieve this by setting realistic goals, focusing on your strengths, and celebrating your achievements. It's also important to establish and maintain healthy boundaries, which will help you prioritize your own needs and protect your self-worth.

Practicing positive self-talk is another effective way to boost self-esteem. By replacing negative thoughts and beliefs with positive and supportive ones, you can cultivate a more compassionate and empowering mindset. Additionally, seeking support from professionals, such as the experienced team at Kelly Hint Coaching, can provide valuable guidance and assistance on your journey towards improving self-esteem and overall well-being.

Remember, you deserve to have a positive self-image and feel good about yourself. Take the necessary steps to improve your self-esteem today and unlock your full potential for happiness and success.



Frequently Asked Questions About Low Self Esteem

What are some signs of low self-esteem?

Some signs of low self-esteem include lack of confidence, external locus of control, negative social comparisons, trouble asking for help, worry and doubt, difficulty accepting compliments, negative self-talk, fear of failure, poor outlook of the future, lack of boundaries, and being a people-pleaser.


How does low self-esteem impact mental health?

While low self-esteem is not a mental illness itself, it can contribute to or worsen mental health conditions such as depression, anxiety, and suicidal thinking. It can also lead to sensitivity to criticism, social withdrawal, hostility, excessive preoccupation with personal problems, and physical symptoms such as depression, anxiety, and substance abuse.


What are the causes of low self-esteem?

Low self-esteem can be caused by experiences in early childhood, such as bullying or neglect. Social media and societal ideals can also contribute to low self-esteem, particularly in teenagers. Stressful life events, such as relationship problems or serious illness, can also lead to low self-esteem. It may stem from negative core beliefs ingrained during childhood or adolescence.


How can I improve my self-esteem?

Strategies to improve self-esteem include identifying troubling conditions and situations, becoming aware of negative thoughts and beliefs, challenging negative or inaccurate thoughts, adjusting mindset, focusing on strengths and achievements, setting realistic goals, practicing self-care and self-compassion, surrounding yourself with supportive people, and seeking professional help if needed.


What is the difference between self-esteem and self-confidence?

While self-esteem refers to a person's overall sense of self-value, self-confidence relates to a person's belief in their abilities in a specific area of life. People with low self-esteem often lack confidence, but it is possible to build confidence separate from self-esteem by acquiring and practicing new skills.


How do boundaries and people-pleasing affect self-esteem?

People with low self-esteem often struggle with setting and maintaining boundaries and may engage in people-pleasing behaviors. This can stem from a fear of rejection or a belief that their own needs are not important. Building healthy boundaries and learning to prioritize one's own needs can help improve self-esteem.


What is the importance of positive self-talk and accepting compliments in improving self-esteem?

Positive self-talk involves changing negative thoughts and beliefs into more positive and supportive ones. It is an important practice for improving self-esteem. Similarly, learning to accept compliments can help boost self-esteem. People with low self-esteem often struggle to accept compliments and may dismiss or downplay them due to their negative self-perception.


How can I improve my overall self-esteem?

Recognizing the signs of low self-esteem and taking steps to improve self-esteem can lead to a more positive self-perception and improved overall life satisfaction. Building confidence, setting boundaries, practicing positive self-talk, and seeking support are all important strategies for improving self-esteem. Schedule a free consult with Kelly Hint Coaching today for professional guidance and support in improving your self-esteem and overall well-being.


Source Links

bottom of page